You knew this was coming. The novelty of legal weed wore off about as fast as the high for most folks. To keep it interesting for those who forgot why they gave up the good stuff years ago, there were new ways to get, store or brag about your fun dose of Vitamin THC.
O.penVAPE 2.0 variable voltage battery (and Craft RESERVE hash oil cartridge)
At you local dispensary. Visit OpenVape.com. Price: $40 for the pen, prices vary for hash oil.
If you’re looking for the weed equivalent of those fancy cigarette holders used by the likes of Cruella DeVille — or, more appropriately, Hunter S. Thompson — we found it: The sleek O.penVAPE 2.0 Variable Voltage Battery provides an air of elegance to “smoking” and takes hash oil vaporizing to the next level by offering, as the name suggests, variable settings for various ranges of stoniness. Available in shiny silver or four eye-popping colors (purple, orange, green or blue), the real staying power of the 2.0 is its rapid USB charger, which ensures no user will have to wait more than 20 minutes in between puffs of the good stuff. Speaking of good stuff, pair this baby with some of O.penVAPE’s Craft RESERVE, a highly distilled hash oil available in 10 strains and 250mg or 500mg cartridges for between $50 and $100, and you’ve got hours of classy and inconspicuous cannabis fun.
— Brandon Johansson
The Broadmoor stash box
Call 719-602-0485 or visit ColoradoStashBox.com. Price: $140.
If your weed tin looks like your kitchen junk drawer, the Broadmoor stash box is just for you. Sorting, storing and keeping cannabis fresh is a cinch with the Colorado Stash Box humidor-style container, which comes with a deep pull-out drawer and a locking latch that keeps your grass-and-hash-stash from drying out — or getting in the wrong hands. The Broadmoor box ($140) is and is made of solid, reclaimed Colorado aspen or beetle kill pine and includes enough additional storage for vaporizers, a roller, papers, grinder and pipes. By carefully crafting each box using computer numeric control machining, each unique container has that perfect airtight fit and a beautiful, natural, Colorado wood personality.
— Rachel Sapin
Lords of Cannabis
Find it on spencersonline.com. Price: $29.99.
There’s always that one friend that’s way too enthusiastic about nerd culture. They un-ironically enjoyed Neil deGrasse Tyson’s remake of “Cosmos,” for some reason they’re fascinated by minerals and rocks, and they probably own at least one set of Legos they actually purchased as an adult. This is the person who will unabashedly enjoy the “Lords of Cannabis” board game. If “Settlers of Catan” and marijuana had a baby, this would be the resulting lovechild. Part board game, part strategy, all centered on being the ruler of pot, this game will undoubtedly entertain a crowd (or just you and that one stoner nerd friend on a Thursday night, in between episodes of “Doctor Who” and “Game of Thrones.”)
-Susan Gonzalez
The Frost Pipe
Visit FrostPipe.com. Price: $25 for one; $40 for two.
People in Colorado know cold and they now know marijuana, so the marriage of the two makes for true ganja love. Enter the Frost Pipe, a customizable frozen pipe to liven up the smoking process. Simply insert the stopper into the plastic pipe mold, fill with water and stick it in the freezer for six-to-eight hours. Pop it out of the mold, drop it in the accompanying tray — to keep from freezing your hands, of course — plop in the provided screen where the stopper had been to keep the weed of your choice dry, and fire up a nug. Good for outdoors on hot Colorado days or inside on cold ones. For variety, add flavors or anything you choose to the water. Then, just chill and enjoy.
— Courtney Oakes
NES Classic Edition
Available at select retailers. Visit Nintendo.com. Price: $59.99.
OK, so maybe this isn’t specifically a cannabis-related gift — after all, you don’t have to be stoned to enjoy classic video games, but it helps. And with 30 preprogrammed titles to choose from and three radical 8-bit display mode options — including the CRT filter, which “looks like an old TV, scan lines and all” — nothing will kill more high times than the miniature NES Classic Edition. With one-third of the titles offering simultaneous, two-player action, throw in an extra controller and make it a real party. Since you’ll be providing entertainment and Mario’s magic mushrooms, make sure your friends bring the weed — and the Jolt Cola. And keep Domino’s on speed dial, because we got a feeling you won’t be leaving the house again for awhile.
— Jeremy Johnson
‘Wake & Bake: a Cookbook’
Find it on barnesandnoble.com. Price: $19.99.
Munchies. Such is the curse of the weed smoker. There’s nothing worse than getting high as a kite only to realize “past you” forgot to buy “future you” some damned Cheetos, instead opting for the much healthier, but less desirable, kale and quinoa. Gross. The best way around this is to eat as you ingest marijuana. No, not driving to the nearest Good Times Burgers & Frozen Custard and smoking a joint — we’re referring to edibles, people. Expensive? Yes. But why not make your own with some guidance from “Wake & Bake: a cookbook,” all about pot-infused treats? And featuring gluten-free, dairy-free and even vegan recipes, this book is geared to all you Coloradan health nuts who still like to light up (and occasionally indulge the Munchie Monster). Bake on, friends.
-Susan Gonzalez
Colorado pot map poster
Available through MapShirts on Etsy.com. Prices vary.
Pop art meets pot art with the Colorado Pot Map Poster. Give somebody the gift of Colorado pride (even if they might be a transplant here to enjoy the state’s treasures) and stoke their affinity for marijuana with this topographically themed poster, available in laminated or un-laminated sizes of 16×20 inches, 24×30 inches or 32×40 inches (ranging between $28 and $76 on Etsy). A state road map overlaid with a cutout of a marijuana leaf, attached to the word “Colorado,” the print works well in the color green — an obvious choice — but is also available in blue, purple, red or black. Posters come printed on high-quality HP 9.1-mil premium archival photographic paper with satin finish, but lamination is the way to go if you want to make sure it is protected from the indoor elements — including any cannabis clouds that might be in its vicinity. The stark contrast and clean design lends itself well to a framed look, but would appear equally at home tacked up next to a tie-dyed Bob Marley dorm room tapestry, too.
— Courtney Oakes
Juicy Jay’s blunt rolling machine
Available online. Visit JuicyJays.com. Price: Under $10.
A wise man once noted that you only live once, so your blunts should be especially large — or something like that. But what if you never mastered the art of cracking open a Swisher? That’s where Juicy Jay’s Cigar Roller comes in. While it retails for under $10, don’t be startled by its lack of luxurious price. This baby with a name similar to the famed Three Six Mafia rapper will let you roll a blunt that will look at home in the ash tray of any Southern rap impresario. Unfortunately, it seems Memphis’ favorite son isn’t really affiliated with these particular dope-smoking accessories. But don’t fret. Even if that Juicy J isn’t raking in any cash from this Juicy Jay, you can still twist up a blunt that would make the Academy Award winning Juicy — along with DJ Paul, Project Pat and the rest of the Three Six Mafia Crew — pretty impressed. And really high.
— Brandon Johansson
Dope on a Rope Hemp Soap
Available locally at the Hemp Center in Littleton or Life Flower Dispensary in Denver. Call 720-840-0094 or visit Dopeonaropesoap.com. Price: $7.99.
The last time we heard a triple rhyme this delightfully silly, it came compliments of A Tribe Called Quest’s late, legendary rhymester Phife Dawg. In a rare attempt to prevent getting this glossy rag into too much trouble, we won’t utter the exact line, but it’s a doozy. And according to dopeonaropesoap.com, these little, soapy trinkets provide a delectable doozy for all of your parched patches of skin, made arid by that darn mountain air. With dozens of aromas to choose from, the soap purveyor makes each ornament with coconut, palm and safflower oils, along with, of course, “a good dose of hemp seed oil.” The jury’s still out on the exact medical effects of bathing in a cauldron of sticky icky bubbles, but it’s supposed to be quite a joyride for the skin. The company’s best-selling bar is infused with eucalyptus and peppermint essential oils. Other aromas include lavender orange, blueberry kush, and sage and cedar oil, among others. Now, go: tell your mother, tell your father, send a telegram.
— Quincy Snowdon
Mary’s Medicinals
Visit www.marysmedicinals.com. Prices vary.
When battered and bruised MMA fighter Nate Diaz puffed on a vape pen at a press conference following the UFC 202 fight earlier this summer, it renewed the discussion of whether cannabis can heal, in addition to its already proven ability to get us high as hell. The folks at Denver-based Mary’s Medicinals sure believe so, and patients seeking cannabis-related therapy needn’t necessarily smoke, eat or drink pot products to get the good effects. For that outdoor adventure stoner or the crunchy, organic type looking for alternative healing, Mary’s makes all sorts of muscle-relaxing, sleep-inducing or anxiety-reducing medications, ranging from cannabidiol and cannabinol transdermal patches and pens to topical compounds and rubs to protein powder, tincture and “bootlegger distillates.” If you know where it hurts but don’t know what you need to help, Mary’s online Cannabis Man is available to help with a diagnosis. He’ll see you get just what the doctor ordered.
— Jeremy Johnson
Marijuana Ride the Light Rail T-Shirt from Mutiny Café
2 S. Broadway, Denver. Call 303-778-7579 or visit mutinyinfocafe.com. Price: $14.99-$20.99.
They say satire is the weapon of reason. If that’s truly the case — and anyone who has read a few lines of David Sedaris will surely tell you it is — then the diffident table of t-shirts at Mutiny Information Cafe in Denver is a premium nuclear warhead. Ranging from sleek to just plain acerbic, the shirts made by a local screen printer put a logo on the frustration so many Denverites and residents of the greater metroplex feel on a daily basis. But the creme de la creme is a black T with a print in the style of Metallica’s famous “Ride The Lightning” album cover: Instead of the band’s name lit up in neon lettering, however, the shirt reads “Marijuana” above a prominent, electrified RTD train and the diminutive command “Ride the light rail.” For $20.99 it’s an apt stocking stuffer for any salty local resident and metal-head stoner. Also available is a simple take on what is perhaps the most maddening, yet pervasive phrase of the day: “Make America Great Again.” At Mutiny, the phrase has been bastardized to read, “Make Denver Cheap Again.” For $14.99, we think we could find some fist-wagging folks in the Aurora Sentinel comment section who would jump at the chance to wear such an inspired slogan.
— Quincy Snowdon
A handcrafted Heady Glass bong
Call 303-777-7558 or visit HeadyGlass.com. Prices vary.
If you’re going to smoke, you could do like hip-hop superstar 2 Chainz does and test out a scorpion-like $50,000 bong mask. But then, most stoners just don’t have that kind of cash flow. So, if you’re not ready to make that kind down-payment-on-a-house commitment, the fine folks at Denver-based Heady Glass will assist you with a variety of high-end but perfectly practical glass-blown pipe collections from area artists. Their newest release, the aptly-named Atom Beaker, “because it looks like an out-of-this-world chemistry set,” is $399. Or maybe the SNIC Electroformed stand-up bubbler is more your style, if you’re more down with that whole hands-free thing.
— Rachel Sapin