QUIDNUNC: ‘Ka-ching, ka-ching, ka-ching’ goes Aurora’s trolley folly

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QUID HAS HEARD that the odds aren’t good for finding a posh new home for the city’s bourgeois trolley. The decades-old trolley car — which used to run on a forgotten line on Colfax until it was run out of the city and inside a home on the city’s eastern edge years ago — has become the darling of local history buffs and museum sorts. The problem is, the trolley is big, and the museum is small. City folk have struggled with what exactly to do with the old, now refurbished, car. Besides being cool, it doesn’t do much or go far. So how about raising a half-million dollars or so to build a bigger history museum to offer a bigger place to park that old trailer that Jack built? You get the idea. Councilwoman Molly Markert suggested a betting pool allowing gamblers to pick odds on whether the old trolley would find a new home before new trolleys start rolling on the FasTracks line along I-225. Markert said she’d put $5 on the trolley. Any of us should live so long.

AND QUID HAS HEARD that barbecue season is over in Aurora before it even begins. Seems the local fire officials are worried, worried, worried that the state’s third-largest city will befall the fate of Mrs. O’Leary’s cow-kick as Colorado’s drought wears on. Not only are fireworks banned, but so, too, are any kind of fire, flame or extra spicy food. The only exemptions to the ban are gas or charcoal barbecue grills “used at single family residences for cooking or warming food, which do not produce open flames when used.” Quid knows for certain that the extra-fat T-bones headed for the holiday brazier will for certain create a full and rewarding flame, and that the decaying moth corpses from last year’s holiday broil on the crem-o-lator create spectacular flames that apparently put at risk the entire Front Range. It would appear, Aurora, that it’s veggie burgers on the George Foreman grill or bust.

AND QUID HAS HEARD that the line forms here for those wanting to star in DIY Network TV’s Rescue Renovation show. Producers are looking for folks in the Aurora metro area “who have been screwed over by a contractor and now need help finishing their home renovation project.” Honestly, is there anyone who’s had renovation work that doesn’t feel like they’d been screwed over? If you are hating your contractor, contact DIY at [email protected], if you love your contractor and he did stuff for free, or cooked dinner while he was there, contact me at [email protected]

AND THAT’S ALL THE NEWS THAT FITS.