EDITOR: Children face many obstacles throughout their youth, and unfortunately, navigating the devastation of bullying has become an all too common rite of passage for them. Regrettably, this leads to negative effects on a child’s emotional and sometimes physical health. The National Bullying Prevention Center reports that more than one out of every five students report being bullied (National Center for Educational Statistics, 2016). Often times children and parents may not even be aware of all the forms bullying can take, and although October shines a light on Bullying Prevention, it truly is an issue that warrants being addressed all year long.
Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school-aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. To be considered bullying, the behavior must be aggressive and include the imbalance of power and repetition, so it must happen more than once (stopbullying.gov, 2019). Bullying also has many ugly faces that include: physical bullying (kicking, hitting, fighting), verbal bullying (hurtful statements, name calling, belittling), relational aggression (social manipulation to sabotage a peer’s social standing, spreading rumors, ostracizing others from a group), cyberbullying (making online threats, hurtful texts, hurtful social media posts), sexual bullying (crude comments, vulgar gestures, sexual propositioning), and prejudicial bullying (targeting others because of their differences).
It is imperative to be aware of all of the ways children and students can become victims of bullying, and more importantly to help find ways to help prevent and combat it. If bullying is left unaddressed it can have catastrophic effects on a child’s personal truth leading to an increased risk for poor school adjustment, sleep difficulties, anxiety, and depression (Center for Disease Control, 2017).
Here are some ways we can take a stand against bullying:
Help Kids Understand Bullying
If a child knows what bullying is and all the forms it can take, then he/she will be better able to identify it. Once bullying is identified it is important that children know safe ways to stand up to bullying and help prevent it. Encourage children to speak to a trusted adult if they are being bullied or see someone else being bullied. Talk to children about ways they can report bullying anonymously if it makes them feel better, and make sure they understand if you see something, say something. Encourage children to show kindness to other children and students who may have been victims of bullying.
Keep the Lines of Communication Open
Although at times we may not feel like it, children really do look to parents and caregivers for help and advice when they are facing tough situations. Try spending 10-15 minutes a day letting your children know they can come to you with their worries or problems. Make sure to listen to the little things when they are little so they then tell you the big things when they are big, because to them, they have always been big. Start a conversation about the highs and lows of their day, ask who they sit with at lunch, and discuss bullying directly. Ask them what bullying means to them and then identify adults they can go to if they ever encounter bullying.
Encourage Kids to do What They Love
When a student or child is involved in activities they enjoy it can help boost self-esteem which in turn can build confidence and help protect kids from being the target of bullying. Participating in activities also helps children build a network of peers and friends to turn to if they find themselves the target of bullying.
Model How to Treat Others with Kindness and Respect
Children watch the adults in their lives, so be sure to model kindness and respect. They watch how conflict and frustration is handled and will often model what they see the important adults in their lives doing.
Although as caregivers we want to ensure our children feel comfortable coming to us with information about bullies, sometimes they may not. There are some great resources to share with your children regarding bullying at www.stopbullying.gov and https://www.stompoutbullying.org/ . Additionally, students can submit anonymous reports to https://safe2tell.org/ if they, or someone they know, is the target of bullying. Together we can let children know that bullying will not be tolerated, and we can work towards a culture with inclusion, equality, civility, and unity.
Nicole Smith, M.Ed., NCC
Colorado Connections Academy School Counselor
Aurora, CO — via letters@Sentinelcolorado.com
https://www.connectionsacademy.com/colorado-online-school