QUIDNUNC: Fear and loafing on I-225

QUID HAS HEARD that driving the speed limit in Colorado has its advantages. Namely, you have the advantage of seeing up close every driver in the state honk their horns, flash their lights or flip you off from the comfort of your own rear-view mirror. Take a look around at Colorado’s motorways and you’re likely to spot miracles of physics every day: nearly 90 percent of the cars are driving half the speed of sound. Now, on the autobahn that’s just perfect. But our “pass on the right,” erratic driving habits tend to put everyone on or around the roads at risk, including pedestrians and Quid. We’re all for thinning the herd, and letting bad drivers take care of themselves, but that doesn’t work when said bad driver is piloting a two-ton missile on public roadways. But don’t fear, Aurora Police have a handful of their finest, hard at work ever yday, flagging every motorist alive at Parker Road and Interstate 225 for rolling through a stoplight on a right-hand turn. Just barely too. Keep it up guys. 

QUID HAS HEARD postal service workers in Aurora are the best, and they proved it last month. Danny Chavis, a letter carrier, alerted authorities after he noticed that a resident hadn’t picked up their mail for a few days. When medics arrived they saw that the resident had suffered a stroke and was incapacitated. Had Chavis not alerted authorities, the situation may have ended very differently, and for his diligence, care, compassion and heroism the city owes Chavis a sincere “Thank you,” and a great ol’ big hug from all of us. Having said all that, if Quid doesn’t pick up our mail for even a single day, call the cops. Don’t wait for the stench. Have you seriously read some of the stuff we’ve written about congressional candidates recently?

QUID HAS HEARD there’s another competitive race in Aurora that’s worth watching. Recently a donation email popped up in Quid’s email and, thinking someone was offering Quid cash, we eagerly opened it to inspect its contents. “Dear Quid, Your support is essential to the outcome of this election. Colorado’s Congressional District 6 is one of the most watched districts in the country this year … Colorado’s CD-6 is the only district in the entire nation where Democrats have even odds of unseating a Republican incumbent,” it read. Quid agrees. It’s only until you realize that the email is from a candidate running for CD-6’s REGENT seat — not congressional seat — that this becomes a little suspect. Hats off to Naquetta Ricks for skipping a step and moving right on into mildly deceptive practices well before she ever takes office. 

AND THAT’S ALL THE NEWS FIT TO PRINT